Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam 7.12.1
—
Bombay, April 12, 1976
The whole Vedic civilization is on the basis of controlling the senses. The yoga practice, it is also meant for controlling the senses. Yoga indriya-saṁyamaḥ. By some artificial bodily exercise one can control the senses. That is called yoga. But one who becomes directly a devotee, his sense control is automatically done, if he is devotee. Bhaktiḥ pareśānubhavo viraktir anyatra syāt [SB 11.2.42]. If one is devotee, then he does not like anything material. And the sex enjoyment is the topmost pleasure in this material world. So naturally one who is devotee, he doesn't require to practice brahmācārya separately-paraṁ dṛṣṭvā nivartate [Bg. 9.59]—because sex pleasure may be very nice in this material world, but when one gets a sense of spiritual pleasure, then this pleasure becomes abominable. It is said by Yamunācārya,
yad-avadhi mama cetaḥ kṛṣṇa-padāravindayor
nava-nava-dhāmany (udyataṁ) rantum āsīt
tad-avadhi bata nārī-saṅgame (smaryamāne)
bhavati mukha-vikāraḥ suṣṭu niṣṭhīvanaṁ ca
"Since I have begun to understand Kṛṣṇa consciousness and getting relish, then, since then, when I think of...," bata nārī-saṅgame, "sex pleasure with woman, I spite on it and my mouth becomes curved, 'Eh,' like that."
Actually it is the position, but because we are under the spell of māyā, we are captivated, bewildered, that after sex life, not only human being, but anyone who is living within this material world, beginning from Brahmā down to the smallest insect, everyone is after sex life. We have heard that even Lord Śiva, Lord Brahmā, they became sexually excited. It is said that Lord Brahmā was enchanted by daughter, what to speak of others. This material world is so, I mean to say, bewildering, that sometimes the first-class person also becomes bewildered by sex life. Therefore it is strictly prohibited that one should not remain in a solitary place with woman even though the woman is mother, sister or daughter. This is the injunction of the śāstra. Mātrā svasrā duhitrā vā na viviktāsane vāset, balavān indriya-grāmo vidvaṁsam api karṣati [SB 9.19.17]. This is the order, that mātrā... Mātrā means "along with mother," svasrā mean "along with sister," and duhitrā means "along with daughter." "One should not sit down in a solitary place even with mother, sister or daughter."
So one may be surprised, that "Nobody becomes agitated, sitting before mother, sister or daughter." But śāstra says, "No, no. They are agitated." Then you can say, "Maybe agitates some fool rascal." "No." Vidvaṁsam api karṣati: "Even though one is very advanced, learned, they also become agitated." Therefore you should be very, very careful. Very, very careful. And another place is, another... Just like in our society, compulsorily we have to mix with women—not only women, very beautiful young girls. But if one is not agitated even in this association of beautiful women and girls, then he is to be considered paramahaṁsa. He is very advanced. Those who are not... Paramahaṁsa means he's above all these material qualities.
So we cannot avoid in our Kṛṣṇa consciousness movement. That was the problem from the very beginning. In India there is restriction between men and women, free intermingling, but in your country there is no such restriction. Therefore I got my disciples married. They criticize me that I have become a marriage-maker. Anyway, I wanted at least to regulate. That is required. Dharmāviruddhaḥ kāmo 'smi. Kṛṣṇa also says. Now, a married man also can be brahmacārī. If a married man stick to one wife, and before sex, if he takes permission from his spiritual master, then he is brahmacārī. Not whimsically. When the spiritual master orders him that "Now you can beget a child," then he is brahmacārī. Śrīla Vira-Rāghava Ācārya, he has described in his comment that there are two kinds of brahmacārī. One brahmacārī is naiṣṭhikī-brahmacārī; he doesn't marry. And another brahmacārī is... Although he marries, he is fully under control of the spiritual master, even for sex. He is also brahmacārī.